- Published on
A Trapdoor in the Psyche" - oil on Yupo, 19.5 x 19 inches This item is sold unmounted and unframed. (click on the image to purchase)
A Trapdoor in the Psyche
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A handful of times a lifetime, if you are lucky, an experience opens a trapdoor in your psyche with its almost unbearable beauty and strangeness, its discomposing unlikeness to anything you have known before. Down, down you go into the depths of the unconscious, dark and fertile with the terror and longing that make for suffering, the surrender that makes for the end of suffering, not in resignation but in faith. It is then that the still, small voice of the soul begins to sing; it is then that the trapdoor becomes a portal into a life larger, truer, and more possible — a kind of rebirth. - MARIA POPOVA
There is an art to handling life's more challenging experiences.
Similar to creating art, it requires a lot of practice (and a lot of failure) before it can be wrangled or mastered. For me, these experiences that open a trapdoor in the psyche are something I can intellectually understand, but to feel the way through the experience in my heart and body (like a dancer, or sculptor or even a painter) is something I struggle with. It's all there, up in my head, what I should do, what will move it along - but how do I put it into play?
Similar to creating art, it requires a lot of practice (and a lot of failure) before it can be wrangled or mastered. For me, these experiences that open a trapdoor in the psyche are something I can intellectually understand, but to feel the way through the experience in my heart and body (like a dancer, or sculptor or even a painter) is something I struggle with. It's all there, up in my head, what I should do, what will move it along - but how do I put it into play?
Part of the art of the trapdoor is being present with where you are within it - are you in the terror and longing? Are you in surrender? Are you in the singing of the small voice of your soul? Not forcing, just accepting, having faith that it is, indeed, a process that you will move through and emerge from - you see, I know this, but doing it is something else entirely. Sigh.
But I am learning to look at these experiences as I would a painting - some of them emerge from their "ugly" phase and become something radiant. Some are just practice pieces that are huge fails on their own, but teach me something that will make the next one easier, better, more. These small, incremental shifts in seeing challenging experiences just a little bit differently will one day pay off. Just watch - I'll be gliding my way through effortlessly and gracefully. Well, that's the goal, anyway.
But I am learning to look at these experiences as I would a painting - some of them emerge from their "ugly" phase and become something radiant. Some are just practice pieces that are huge fails on their own, but teach me something that will make the next one easier, better, more. These small, incremental shifts in seeing challenging experiences just a little bit differently will one day pay off. Just watch - I'll be gliding my way through effortlessly and gracefully. Well, that's the goal, anyway.
About the art: hello, Yupo - it is always nice to be on your playground, where layers build brilliantly and paint glides like butter. For this piece, the main focus was capturing the mottled tones of the main character's face, which came only after the 80 millionth layer. But at that moment - voila! Such satisfaction. The folds and lines in the clothing are created by using a small rubber wedge to carve back through the paint. Yupo is the only substrate I've found that this works so smoothly with.
The August Reader Giveaway is in full swing! One (or more) lucky readers will win a free piece of art! Just subscribe, read and comment anytime in the month of August to enter. Already subscribed? Just comment to enter! Comment multiple times during the month and be entered as many times. WHOA! Wonder Mike LOVES sending free art each month. The winner will be announced here in the blog at the end of the month. Ready? Set? ENTER!
The painting is wonderful as always, your thoughts hold so much power. Your post aligns so strongly with my ideas and resonates with me. It’s as if you are writing my thoughts, just much more eloquently than I could ever do.
More, more, more.
The power of making art and being in the force field of art to set the soul singing.
HOO-ee, Lola!
So much of my life I have spent trying to avoid the messy and scary moments. I wrap myself in a protective cocoon and let life pass by. I realize there is so much I deny myself by not participating and growing. Life is meant to be lived and even though it isn't easy I need to get through the difficult moments to be born as a butterfly.
I need to do better and challenge myself more. I love that I have your beautiful and fierce, Esme, here. She is a remarkable reminder to be bolder and braver in the moments I do control. I don't think there will ever be a time we can easily submit to the surprise difficulties, but if it was easier we might not take away as much in the end.
Thank you for sharing your wisdom here! xo