- Published on
Vanished
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Vanished
oil on yupo
11 x 14 inches
This item is unmounted and unframed.
(click on the image to purchase)
There is no assuaging the fear that things end & people leave. - SIMON JIMENEZ, THE VANISHED BIRDS
On my journey through life, on the way to self-understanding, I have come to know I am often deeply afraid of the end of things, especially relationships (romantic, familial, social, professional and so on). That fear has sometimes kept me embroiled in situations which were unhealthy, unacceptable and even abusive.
I accept this aspect of myself now, even to the point where I can write about it here, in a public space. Admittedly, I am a tiny bit nervous about doing so.
It is a remnant of the past, an echo of history, a whisper from my inner child. This person I have become sees the beauty of many endings and the space created by them for other, better, bigger, marvelous things! Even the completion of a painting creates space and time for the next one.
Right now, the ending of summer has created space for the beauty of fall. The end of a glorious vacation brings inspiration and a new sense of earned badassery.
I am curious - how are you with endings?
It is a remnant of the past, an echo of history, a whisper from my inner child. This person I have become sees the beauty of many endings and the space created by them for other, better, bigger, marvelous things! Even the completion of a painting creates space and time for the next one.
Right now, the ending of summer has created space for the beauty of fall. The end of a glorious vacation brings inspiration and a new sense of earned badassery.
I am curious - how are you with endings?
I spent four years in a studio of white walls. Slowly, inxorably ruining the walls with tape, paint, nail holes, bumps and scuffles until the walls pulled my eyes away from the art and chastized me. What are you doing with these white walls, they demanded to know. And I had no answer. What color do you paint walls when you live in a wonderland of color?
But knowledge is vast and the internet is astounding and I came across this article which was a lightbulb moment: there are specific colors best suited for studio walls. Who knew? Not me.
And now, after the crew has departed, the walls are nodding and high-fiving me and waiting for me to start painting with them as the backdrop. Ok, challenge accepted
But knowledge is vast and the internet is astounding and I came across this article which was a lightbulb moment: there are specific colors best suited for studio walls. Who knew? Not me.
And now, after the crew has departed, the walls are nodding and high-fiving me and waiting for me to start painting with them as the backdrop. Ok, challenge accepted
About the art: this piece began as an intuitive response to color - a dash of leftover red-orange on a piece of Yupo, a need to put teal nearby. And before I knew it there was full immersion and a palette full of paint, a palette knife and time passing without my knowledge. A landscape of sorts, a place to rest from the world, vertical tree-ness and flowing water-ness and a deep sigh of contentment. If only all paintings flowed this way!
Thanks to Trina T. for the idea she placed in the "suggestion box" last week! For the month of October, the Reader Giveaway winner will have the opportunity to participate in a Question Exchange - five questions asked and answered between the reader and myself, via email, phone call or Zoom. Trina's idea to foster connection during tumultuous times is a grand one, I think, and I am looking forward to seeing how this experiement resonates with all of you, dear readers. XO
To enter the giveaway, simply leave a comment on any blog post this month - even if it is another idea for the "suggestion box" for reader giveaways! And thanks to all who read, comment and share this blog. You make me smile!
To enter the giveaway, simply leave a comment on any blog post this month - even if it is another idea for the "suggestion box" for reader giveaways! And thanks to all who read, comment and share this blog. You make me smile!
Then there are the endings and changes we DO mastermind. BUH-bye white studio walls, HELLO specific color best suited for studio walls. YES! GORGEOUS!
AND I can FEEL the full immersion, palette full of paint, and time's passing without your knowledge embodied in "Vanished." So magical, that flow!
Thanks also for celebrating with me a change of color and the resulting inspiration! xoxoxo
So much to like in this post. The painting is wonderful. I have to look at it again and again. I love the colors in the studio. I too never thought much about it. If I ever have a permanent studio space again instead of bouncing between the guest room, the dining room and classrooms I’ll make that part of the space’s consideration! I love the 5 questions thing! Great idea by Trina. We are different when it comes to endings. I spent my career changing jobs every 5 years I relished being able to reinvent myself. I’m also pretty severe about friendships. I don’t take ending them lightly, if it needs to be done it needs to be done. I rarely second guess those decisions. That’s a part of my personality I come to decisions quickly and don’t look back. I told Wendy after three weeks of dating I loved her. Lucky for me she didn’t run four the hills. We celebrate 36 years of marriage on 10/14. Excellent post today as always.
Celebrating with you and Wendy! What an extraordinary, wonderful thing! You two are meat to be - a neverending love! xoxo
Have you gotten pushback when you have spoken about endings with family or friends before?
Or has there been a blessed silence?
Or something else?
Excellent questions. I have received pushback in the past, and sometimes silence, and sometimes endings as a result. Perhaps when you're surrounded with the "wrong" people, sharing your fears merely provides them with another tool for making you feel bad (especially when your sadness or upset provides them with some kind of spark). OY!